Still on the Hunt

I'm still on the job hunt. I had a temp job for a little while. 5 days to be exact. I was getting ready to leave work at 4:55 pm yesterday and I saw that I had a voicemail on my cell phone. It was my temp agency telling me not to come back on Monday. They had gotten a call from my supervisor that I had finished all the work so fast that they didn't need me to come back, because there's nothing left to do. Mother. Fucker.

I was told that the job was "open ended", which I assumed meant that there would be plenty for me to do for a while. I guess it really meant that they didn't know how long the job would take. The answer? 36.5 hours. The kicker is that I had my supervisor sign my timesheet at 4:40 pm, and she didn't say anything. The time on the voicemail from my agency was 4:00 pm. So she knew that I wouldn't be coming back and she didn't even say anything when she signed my timesheet! No "great job, sorry we're out of work for you to do." Not even a "sorry to tell you this, but today's your last day." I didn't listen to the voicemail until after she left, so I had no clue it was my last day. I was seriously pissed. It just felt so shady, like she was too much of a pussy to tell me. I WAS WORKING FOR THE FUCKING HR DEPARTMENT TOO!!! You'd think that someone working in HR would be a little more upfront and sensitive. Whatever.

I did have a really great final interview last week. It's for an Administrative Assistant position at a top PR firm in downtown Chicago. I'm up against 2 other people and they should be making a decision next week. I really like the company a lot and I would be very happy if they made an offer. I also have a friend that works at the company, which definitely helped in the interview process. It's all about who you know. Seriously, if you are looking for a job, you should really consider reaching out to your network of friends for help. I have been so blessed over the years to find great opportunities through my friends. Companies take referrals from friends a lot more seriously. The job I applied for was posted on Monster.com and I'm sure that if I didn't know someone who worked there, I would have never landed an interview. For every job posting on Monster or Careerbuilder, at least 100 people apply, I'm sure. Not only are unemployed people applying for these jobs (people who really need them and are willing to do anything to land them), but also employed people who are looking for their next move to get out of their current situation. The competition is insane.

So I'm back in the temp pool; still interviewing for permanent jobs. I'm not counting on anything and I am trying to hedge my bets as best I can. I'm updating my agencies every few days to remind them I still exist. Some of my staffing agencies are being really great and helpful. Some are not. Some actually listened to what I was looking for in a position. Some just want a pulse and will try to submit you for a job that you clearly are not interested in. Some stop calling after you've turned down too many opportunities to be submitted. BUT, some are great and keeping calling, because they understand that there's no point in submitting you for a job you don't want, because even if you do get hired, you will probably not stay long and their client will be pissed.

I've been thinking a lot lately about writing. Like writing a novel, or a play. I have no idea what I'd write. Or even what I'd write about. Well, I'll have plenty of time to write, come Monday!

I was happy to learn a week ago that a replacement was hired for me at the hotel. Thank God! I was really feeling guilty about that for a while; knowing that my friends at my old job were having to do my job after I left.

I guess that's it for now. Not much to report on the weight loss side. I can report that temp jobs are bad for your diet, because they are so boring that all you think about is "what can I eat?" and "when can I eat next?" And since you are alone for breaks and lunch, and you're bored, you tend to eat more because at least it's entertainment. Food becomes something to look forward to; the ONLY thing to look forward to. And when I have people to eat with, I don't have such insane cravings. I eat what I have and then I chat. I don't have time to think about, "what else can I eat?" I tried shopping a bit this week during my hour lunch break, and found some cute shorts at Sears; but as I'm on a budget, shopping is definitely not as fun as it used to be. And even though it sucks that my best friend is also unemployed now too, at least I will have someone to hang out with during the day. But hopefully for not too long!

Gainfully Unemployed

I quit my job last week. I had been thinking about doing it for a long time, but I finally had an anxiety attack in the middle of the night last Wednesday. I was crying and shaking on the living room couch, desperate to get out of the situation ASAP. And in the morning I went into work and gave my resignation.

It is one of the hardest things I've ever done. When you quit a job that you wanted to work out so badly, and you worked so hard to get, you feel like a personal failure when it doesn't. I went into this position knowing exactly what was expected -- long hours, lots of paperwork, lots of clients to deal with --- and I gave it 1,000%, especially because I was not from the industry and I had something to prove. The hotel took a chance on me, and I didn't want to let them down. There is a tremendous amount of guilt in just picking up and leaving, especially when you've become close with the people that you're working with --- just knowing that they are going to have to be the ones to pick up the pieces after you've gone. But I had to do it. I've never been more irresponsible in my life. I've always been the one to do the "right thing"-- the one who always gave at least 2 weeks notice and did all she could to prepare the job for her departure. But I just couldn't do it this time. I had created a physical and mental aversion to my job. It literally made me nauseous just thinking about all the clients, all the paperwork, all the millions of things that needed to get done in such short periods of time, and the extra weekends, evenings and early morning hours I'd have to spend just being there to make sure events went off right. I imagined the rest of my life being chained to that place, with no ability to just plan a weekend away somewhere, for fear that someone might book an event that I'd have to work. And that's no way to live. It was not the right fit, and I knew it in my gut.

I cried and cried for 24 hours after I quit. The nausea started going away a few days later (Best Diet Ever, by the way) and I went to Miami with my mom to get away from it all. I decided to start contacting temp agencies right away, but not to worry about them while I was in Florida. I have to tell you, taking that break was the best thing that could have happened. Being away from all my worries allowed me to just let go of all the tension my body had been storing up for the past few months. I felt myself slowly letting go, my muscles relaxing as if I was getting a shiatsu massage. But it was all me --- I allowed myself to relax and my body was so grateful. I found myself falling into the deepest of sleep each night while away; sleep that allowed me to let go and wake up completely refreshed. I hadn't slept like that in MONTHS. My recent slumber ritual usually would result in waking up in the middle of the night at least once a night, remembering something I forgot to do at work in a panic. No more of that. I also found myself exhaling often; large sighs exiting my body in relief. My mom pointed it out before I realized I was doing it. In with the good air, out with the bad...

So it's Day 4 of Julie's Temp Agency Registration Week. I have registered at 5 places so far and will register at 2 more places by the end of the day. I should be able to at least start temping by Monday --- even though it will only be $11-15 an hour, it's something. My recruiters will send me on permanent job interviews as "right fits" become clear to them. I'm focusing now on only Mon-Fri, 8am-5pm jobs as an Executive or Administrative Assistant in the fields of Marketing, Event Planning, Education, Media, or any other creative fields. I'm also open to a non-creative industry, as long as the office is great to work in with great co-workers. I have 4 solid years of Admin. experience going for me at the same company, so that's a positive. If you can type, answer phones and run Microsoft Office, you can really get a job anywhere --- it's finding the company that I WANT to work for that's the tricky part.

Mike, my family and friends have all been so supportive in my choice to leave my job, and I am so grateful to them. They know that I wouldn't have done it unless I was desperate; and I was! While I still feel a little guilty, it's slowly going away; being replaced by some pride in making the right decision for myself. It took some balls to do that, I guess -- to put myself first. It's true that you gotta look out for #1. And it will be ok. We're going to get through this and I'll come out stronger. Yeah. :-)

Rollin' to Miami

I'm now almost 3 months into my new job, and it's going ok. There is a lot of stress involved in the position and I'm still not quite used to it. I don't know what it is, but very often I find myself hating it, wanting to quit. I'm just not feeling it, and I don't know if I ever will. I've been told by my co-workers and boss that I'm doing a great job, so that helps. But I just feel unhappy all the time. Often dreading going to work. Dreading the future of having to go to work. Dreading having to deal with whatever crisis another client or co-worker would bring me that day. I don't know if it's worth it----but at the same time, I don't know what else to do with myself. I don't know what I want and I feel that I just need to stay where I'm at for right now until I can get a better idea of what I'm looking for. It's not so bad that I can't endure it for a while. The job market is just so shitty right now that I can't afford to just pick up and leave without a plan. What I know for sure is that I cannot go back to my old company, even though it's been offered. That would be a huge step back for me and I must keep moving forward. I really like my co-workers though. We go out about once a week after work for drinks and fun. It's really nice to have people to bitch to who can relate to what I'm bitching about.

Bad news though. I've still been gaining weight slowly. I'm up to about 192 right now. It's really maddening. Mike and I make it to the gym at least once a week, and I'm still getting in my 30 min. of cardio a day walking to and from the train to work. And I'm trying to eat healthy. It's very frustrating. I caught an episode of the series "I Can Make You Thin" by Paul McKenna on TLC and he had some really interesting techniques to shift the focus away from food and boost your self esteem, thereby causing you to not think about food as much, become more confident in yourself and start eating like a thin person. For example, one of the main points of his program is that when you're hungry, eat. Sounds simple enough, right? But it really means, "only eat when you're actually hungry". It's a lot harder than it sounds. Another point is "when you're full, stop." I've really been trying to do this and I've found modest success most of the time. The trick is that is has to be used in conjunction with another point: "Eat consciously". Which means you have to actually focus on your food, chewing each bite around 20 times and really savoring each morsel slowly and deliberately. This causes you to feel full before you've devoured the entire plate. But then you actually have to obey the voice in your head that says "I'm full. I should stop now." This is apparently what goes on in the mind of most thin people: my husband for example. He ALWAYS leaves some food on his plate. He just STOPS when he's no longer hungry. Imagine that??!!!?? I have an extremely hard time stopping when I'm full, especially if the food is particularly delicious. There is no logic to this, which is the opposite of how I think. I am an extremely logical person. I do what makes sense. But when it comes to food, I am illogical. Thus is the challenge of my life.

In other, happier news, my Mom and I are going on a trip to Miami on Thursday for 3 days to attend my cousin's bridal shower. She is one of my most favorite cousins but we rarely see each other because she lives in Amsterdam for her job, but she's flying in to Miami for the shower our family is throwing for her (her parents live there and she grew up there.) She is getting married in Tuscany with a very small guest list, so we are using this shower as our opportunity to celebrate, since we won't be going to Tuscany. I am very excited to have some fun in the sun with just me and Mom and to see my Uncle Lenny, who is a hoot. Mikey will be staying behind to hold down the fort. :-)

So that's it for the past 2 months. BOR-ING! I know. Well at least Lost is back on this Thursday. So is Ugly Betty. YAY! Thank you TV, for giving us reason to live. :-)

Update

Hey guys! I'm three weeks into my new job and it's going great. I'm so glad I took the chance, stepped out of my comfort zone and made this move. It was a huge leap of faith, going to this new job and new industry that I've never worked in before. The hotel industry is SO different -- there are so many terms and acronyms and I feel like I've been saying "what does that mean?" every other breath for the last 3 weeks. But I'm finally getting the hang of it and seeing the bigger picture of what my job entails. I have some serious opportunity to make some major impact on this hotel with my position. I really have 2 jobs in one: I'm a Catering Manager, and also a Conference Services Manager. Which means I am in charge of selling food & beverage to all groups that come in here, but also I have to organize all the details of large groups that come in for a block of rooms and/or meetings. At a larger hotel, that would be 2 different people. But since the meeting space at my property isn't that extensive, and business hasn't been that busy in the past few years, the position is for just one person. BUT if I can really book some great business and create a need for another person, they will provide me with that. Pretty sweet.

I'm really getting along great with the people in my new office. I share a decent sized office with 2 other girls and they are great. I have 3 windows in the office, which is great because I've been living in cubicle land for the past 4 years and having direct daylight makes SUCH a difference. Plus sometimes the other 2 are running around the hotel, and it's just me in the office and it's nice and quiet --- and then I can pretend that it's my own personal office! Well, until they come back through the door, that is. :-) The only part about the job that is a major difficulty to me is the free all-you-can-eat employee cafeteria. It's fantastic to have free lunch every day. But the kinds of foods they offer are really bad for you. There is macaroni and cheese at least twice a week --- I'm talking about the really yummy gooey mac n' cheese that you used to have in the cafeteria in grade school. The comfort food that brings you back to a simpler, happy time. Luckily there is a full salad bar every day. So my strategy is to allow myself a little bit of whatever comfort food is there that day that I just can't resist, but then fill my plate up with salad. So far I guess it's working ok --- of course I have to grab a free chocolate chip cookie on my way up to my office. GRRRR!!! I am doing a lot more walking now though, due to the fact that I'm taking the train/bus into the city every day. I'm walking an average of 15 minutes per day, and getting my heart rate up there pretty good while I'm doing it. Now if I can just keep my food intake under control.

I really miss my friends from my old job. Not just because they are amazing and we clicked so well with our personalities, but we ALL were dieting TOGETHER. Every day we brought our Lean Cuisines or our Progresso soups. Now the girls I'm eating with are all about the buffet --- pretty much no one brings their lunch. And I know I could break outside the box and bring my own food....but it's just so free and yummy!!! Grrrr again. I need to do some serious thinking about all of this. I cannot allow myself to undo all of the good that I've done over these past 18 months. I've already undone at least half of what I accomplished.

But on to happier things!!! LOST IS BACK AND IT'S FRIGGIN AWESOME!!!! I am so loving the show this season. It is a high speed rollercoaster ride and I am loving every second of it. I am so happy to hear that the writer's strike is over and they'll soon be making more episodes. And my favorite Lost podcast, The Transmission, is back after a 2 year hiatus! Check them out on iTunes if you're a Lost fan. Great stuff.

Ok, I should probably do something productive. Thanks to everyone for your good wishes!!! I may be blogging less often, but I'll never be gone for good!!

Pop the Champagne

'Cause I just got a NEW JOB!!!!!!!!!!!

I've been holding on for a month and a half and it's finally official. I will be the Catering Sales & Conference Services Manager for the Ambassador East Hotel and The Pump Room!!!!!!!!! This is HUGE for me. For 4 years I have been working for a very nice company --- a beauty school corporation --- and I've finally decided that I want to put theatre on the back burner for a while and really try to make some money in event planning. I am so excited for this position!!! So my job will be to plan meetings and events at this hotel and in The Pump Room, the restaurant made famous by Frank Sinatra and so many other notables throughout the years. Everything but weddings. That's another lady's job.

I just wanted to pop on and share the good news with ya'll. I gave my 2 week notice today and I start January 28th. WAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

2 lbs. down

I lost 2 lbs. this week. Yaaaaaayy!!! I've been going back to some old Weight Watchers recipes, as well as made some new Sparkrecipes, and it's really helping to keep me on track. I especially love coming home to the smell of something cooking in the Crock Pot. And knowing that the stuff in that Crock Pot is for me to eat, AND it's healthy??? It's the best smell ever.

Thumbs up to the "Sweet and Sassy Flank Steak" recipe for the Crock Pot that I made last night. I got that from Sparkrecipes. I swear they are not paying me to talk this highly of them. But it wouldn't hurt (wink, nudge).

Eat This, Not That

On the same lines of my last post, check out this website to see items from most popular fast food and casual dining chain restaurants: what you should eat, and what you should NOT eat at these places. (click the categories along the top to see at least 3 restaurant choices from each category: pizza, sit-down, Mexican, etc.) Of course, many of the items that they list as being on the "healthier" end are still on the most part not the BEST choices (some topping out at over 470 calories) they still do a good job of revealing the lesser of the evils, as well as revealing those items you may have thought were good for you.

For example, they expose Panera's Sierra Turkey sandwich (one of my all-time faves) for just how evil it is --- 840 calories!!! I guess if you can eat only 1/2 and save the rest for later you're ok, but eating the whole thing at once is a little scary! Who knew that eating one of their Crispani pizzas would be healthier??? Though you can only eat 1/3 of the pizza for the 380 calorie charge. Hmmmm... :-/ Other favorite restaurants that they expose are Jimmy John's subs, Chipotle, Taco Bell and Baskin Robbins, among others like McDonald's, Burger King, etc. I seriously want to print out some of these pages and keep them in my car so I know what to order at the drive thru. I think I'll do that!

The article was very helpful to see what items I should be paying more attention to at these establishments. I am avoiding these kind of places in general, but if I'm going out with a friend for dinner or I'm traveling, sometimes I will have to purchase something from one of these places. It's good to be prepared!

9 Health Foods That Aren't

I came across a very interesting article this morning. The article was promoting the "Eat This, Not That" book, but the article was mainly about nine foods that may be considered "healthy" that are really not healthy for you at all. Among their list are such faves as Chicken Caeser Salad, Turkey Burger, Bran Muffins, and Tuna Melts (duh.) The reasons why each item were considered unhealthy were very interesting --- mostly having to do with the misconception that these items are low in calories because they predominantly use "healthy" ingredients. It was usually a sauce or high-calorie bread that causes them to be the opposite. Check out the article here.

Sparkrecipes.com

I just wanted to take a moment to write again about the fabulous Sparkrecipes.com site. I forgot that it existed until I logged in to Sparkpeople yesterday (for the 1st time in a while...) It's a totally separate site that is like a Sister site to Sparkpeople, filled with healthy recipes from real people that use Sparkpeople.

I had defrosted 2 red snapper fillets to eat for dinner last night, and I was going to just do something basic with lemon, herbs, butter substitute, etc. But I was curious to see what Sparkrecipes had on red snapper. So I simply typed in "snapper" in their search engine and a whole bunch of recipes came up, including one called "Cayenne Snapper". I made it last night, all from ingredients I already had in my pantry and it was deeeelish! It's basically Blackened Red Snapper. It was nice and spicy, but you could totally make it more mild by cutting back on the cayenne or red pepper. Have you found any gems on that site, or on other sites you'd like to share?

By the way, if you want to join Sparkpeople, put me down as your referrer... "FLIPTHISBODY" is my user name.

Hungry Girl's Top ATE Tips

I wanted to share this great list put out by Hungry Girl this morning.

Top ATE Tips for successful eating in 2008:

1. Don't go "on a diet". While diet plans can be helpful, if you think of yourself as being "on a diet", everything will be too black and white. If you're on a diet and suddenly you have a little setback, you may decide you're "off your diet" and go back to your old ways. Think of your new eating plan as more of a lifestyle change -- one that will have ups and downs, with good days and bad.

2. Don't deprive yourself. Remember, your new eating plan shouldn't be about deprivation. It should be about SATISFACTION. Find foods you LOVE -- ones that satisfy you but are better choices. This is KEY.

3. Drink lots of water. Water is good for you. It's good for your skin and your metabolism. And it helps fill you up. Plus, not enough water can make you cranky and more likely to make bad food choices.

4. Listen to your body. It knows things. If you know that eating cereal for breakfast makes you hungrier throughout the day, then don't eat cereal in the morning. Pay close attention to your body cues. This will help tremendously.

5. Live one day (or even one MEAL) at a time. Don't be discouraged and beat yourself up if you fall off the wagon and eat badly -- just be more aware of what you eat during your next meal.

6. Get exercise with activities you enjoy. I used to HATE exercising. I feared it. Now I exercise but only do what I like (which happens to b e walking on a treadmill 5 times a week while watching reality TV, and weight training 2 times a week with a friend). Find something you actually like to do, and you'll do it. Don't take on an exercise routine that causes pain or discomfort -- you'll just end up ditching it completely. (And I know this isn't an EATING tip, but it's important!)

7. Let yourself cheat a little. Everyone strays once in a while. It's totally normal. Splurge when you need to, and enjoy it (don't feel guilty)! Then get RIGHT back on track, and prove to yourself that you can handle a cheat meal now and then.

8. Keep track of what you eat. Write it down. As dorky as it sounds, you WILL 100% without a doubt do better if you hold yourself accountable for what you eat by keeping a food journal. Just do it -- even if you only write in it every OTHER day.

I especially love tips # 2 and 4. You have to listen to your body. What works for your friend the next cubicle over might not work for you. Go with your "gut". :-)

2008 To Do List

Hey everybody! It's been a while. I wasn't planning on blogging again anytime soon, but Jessie's post on her 2007 goal list in review inspired me to make my own list for 2008:

1. Lose the 15 lbs. I've gained back since May 2007. Large goals are important, but what's even more important is to set obtainable, reasonable goals. I know I can get back to 172 --- I was just there 7 months ago! Gosh, was it really that long ago that I was at my lowest since starting this blog???

2. Buy our first home. Soon we will have a good down payment ready to go and we are both ready to become homeowners. The ideal would be a single-family home within the Chicago city limits (north side -- preferably a bungalow), but I don't think we're able to afford that just yet. I am hoping for a nice townhouse.

3. Cook more often. I've been watching a lot of the Food Network lately and with all my new kitchen tools from the wedding gifts, I am really progressing in the kitchen. Now I've just got to keep it fresh and healthy and in smaller portions. And not order delivery as much.

4. Revamp my wardrobe. I am just continually uninspired by what's in my closet. I have a lot of solid colored shirts with very little detail. BORING! My problem is that I do not like shopping, period. All the people and navigating the stores is so ANNOYING. And shopping for clothes is even worse, because I do not fit into most clothes. Also, I am in that in-between size of 14/16, which is the highest size in most regular stores and the smallest size in the Plus Size stores. I know what I need to do --- shop more often! And not just when I NEED clothes. I need to force myself to shop on a more regular basis in order to find those perfect pieces.

Ok, 4 things to do this year. That sounds like a good amount. A measurable, obtainable list of goals.

What's on your list?

Hi

Just checking in to say hi. This is the longest stretch that I haven't blogged. 3 weeks! It's not that I don't have anything to say, I just don't feel like saying it I guess. Yeah, I'm pretty boring right now. Really boring I'd say. I'm sorry you have to read this!

Ahem, is this thing on?

Wow, I really haven't had much to say lately. Or at least not much to type.

The audition this weekend was a bust. I thought I had an "in" with someone, but I guess it didn't matter. Well, that's showbiz!

In good news, our wedding photographer chose one of our wedding photos to use in his ad! Actually, he submitted 5 wedding photo options of various couples to Brides Chicago Magazine. And they picked us to use in his ad!!! For a full year of quarterly issues!!! It's one of the pics of Mike and I jammin' out --- him on his bass and me with the microphone. Yeah! We are also one of the samples on www.mychicagowedding.com --- look under Jeremy Lawson Photography and click "view brochure" -- we're one of like 6 photos he's got up there as samples. Woo hoo! People keep asking if we're getting paid for it. And my gut reaction to that is, "Who cares??? We are famous in a bridal magazine!!!" I would make a great reality show contestant.

So....what else? That little diet. Yeah, whatever happened with that? Well, last week I was really good. Tracking my food on Sparkpeople, went to the gym (once), but then the weekend happened and lots of food was really yummy and ... yeah. What's up with my motivation? Not sure where that went. It's so darn unpredictable these days.

Does anyone read this anymore? I hope I'm entertaining someone. Because I'm sure boring myself to death right now.

Here's a random tip: when your cable bill goes up because the special rate period ended, just call them and give them the sob story that you really think you need to cancel because you can't afford the regular rate, and they'll totally put you back at the special rate again. I did. :-)

Checking in

I know I haven't posted in a while. I haven't felt like it. After that whole swollen leg from the wasp incident, I was afraid to go back to the gym until the antibiotics had run their course. I finished them last Wednesday and I'm going back to the gym today. I also want to get back on Sparkpeople today to track my calories. Nothing much exciting going on. But I did go on an audition last week, and I'm going on one this Saturday, so cross your fingers. I don't want to talk about it right now, but I will once it's over. It would be a very fun show to do and I'd be very excited to play any part in it...even a bum on Skid Row... :-)

Life Lessons

One of the adventures of our honeymoon included a tour entitled, "Escape to Paradise" with a company called "Tours de la Bahia" (tours of the bay). This is a pretty broke-ass tour, though I did not know this at the time of booking the tour through our hotel's travel agent. The tour was to take us to places in the nearby Sierra Madres, to small towns and hidden-away waterfalls. We did experience both of those things, but on a broke-down bus from the 70s, with air conditioning UNITS at the front and back of the bus that (I kid you not) would spill a bucket of water with each pothole we hit. They took this 30-passenger monstrosity of a bus (which should not have even been on a public road) up a gravely, unpaved narrow path up the side of a mountain. Just one wrong move by the driver and we could have tumbled down the side of a cliff to our death. Luckily, Mike and I were sitting on the mountain side of the bus.

At each stop we did experience beautiful scenery and breathtaking waterfalls, but the bus was really a problem. So much so that on our way to our lunch stop, the bus broke down. In the middle of the jungle. Luckily we were 3 minutes away from the place we just left, and that place has a restaurant. Our tour guide said that unfortunately there is no cell phone service out there, and there is no phone at the restaurant (????) so the driver was going to try to fix the bus, and as a last resort she would try to send word with another tour company that was driving through to call her company and tell them to send another bus. So with any luck we would be getting back on the original broke-ass bus to go back down the mountain. Yeah...

SO, we settled in for a nice lunch with a couple of cervezas at El Eden, overlooking a waterfall. It was very nice. Unfortunately, while perusing tchochkes in the gift shop, a Crazy Jungle Wasp stung my leg. I managed to pull the stinger out of my calf, but already I started feeling swollen. The waiter slapped a paper towel drenched in tequila on my leg and sent me on my way. (I made sure soon after to use some hand-sanitizer on it too) We got back on the (now "fixed") broke-ass bus to our final stop, at the Don Crispin Tequila distillery STORE. Not the real distillery, because that was another 20 minutes away and we thought it best to not tempt fate. While visiting the tequila store, I started noticing hives along my right wrist and my right arm was turning bright red. The left side of my body was fine. I cooled myself down with a couple cans of Pepsi (one to drink and one to ice my leg) and was totally ready to get back to the hotel.

Another hour later and we were back at our room. The rest of the night we stayed in, as the stinger made my leg very sore, like someone had kicked me hard in the calf. I limped to the door to answer room service. :-) The next morning (after a heavy dose of Advil and room service) I was fine! My leg didn't hurt at all and there was no sign of swelling. The rest of the week went along fine and I didn't have any problems at all.

Then Tuesday (almost a week after) I went to workout (I know, for the first time in months, right?) and I noticed the skin around my sting was totally enflamed and red, about the size of a baseball, and it itched like HELL!!! It was still like this the next day, so I got a doctor's appointment. I went in yesterday and wouldn't you know, it's infected!!! My doctor said it's probably some bacteria that was on my leg got into the wound at some point that day. The reason why symptoms didn't show up until a week later was because the infection had now penetrated into the deep tissue and was causing a stronger reaction (that's what she said.) I was given the antibiotic Cipro (which you'll remember from the Anthrax scares after 9/11) and now have 7 days without calcium or iron, which slows down the effictivity of the drug. BOO!!!

Stupid jungle wasp ruins everything!!! Well, I'm sure glad I went to the doctor. I was sure she would say, "Oh it's nothing, just put some cream on it." But I guess sometimes it's really serious! They also took blood to test to make sure I don't have any other crazy Mexican diseases. Mother fucker. No matter how much our country may be screwed up, we generally have it very, VERY good and I thank God for modern medicine.

FOOD Meme

*GASP!* Two posts in one day??? It feels like the old days again! Well, I have been tagged by Laura of From Sparkly to Spouse with a food meme, so I simply could not resist. Note to Laura: I just had to go back and change all the "favourite"s to "favorite". You crazy Canucks! ;-)

1. How do you like your eggs? Eggs Over Medium, which I did not know was an option until a few years ago. I always ordered Sunny-Side-Up or Over Easy, but always felt they were too runny for my taste. Then one day I overheard someone in a restaurant order "Over Medium", and I was like BRILLIANT!!! Been ordering it ever since.

2. How do you take your coffee/tea? Coffee: 2 Splenda, 2 creams. Tea: love Pomegranate tea (thanks Mo!) with 2 Splenda and sometimes milk. Argo Tea makes a GREAT "Pom Tea" which is Red Tea with a light Pomegranate syrup, and less than 80 calories for a big glass (I think Argo Tea is a Chicago chain store). Also love Bubble Teas, but not sure if that counts as "tea". The tapioca beads in mango smoothie are the BEST!

3. Favorite breakfast food: Eggs Benedict. And Apple Pancake from Walker Brothers. And Corned Beef Hash. Did I mention I have an overeating problem?

4. Peanut butter: Smooth. Lately I've been using "Better N' Peanut Butter". Yeah, it's ok, but it's not the same. Anything with N' in is not to be trusted.

5. What kind of dressing on your salad? Ranch if I'm feeling indulgent. Usually any of the Newmann's Own Light dressings, especially the Sesame Ginger, Honey Mustard or Balsamic Vinagrette.

6. Coke or Pepsi? Coke. Did you know in Mexico it tastes more like Pepsi? Not sure what Pepsi tastes like there, though.

7. You’re feeling lazy, what do you make? Trader Joe's Frozen Gnocchi Alla Sorrenti. I usually buy 2 of these each time I visit TJ's, cuz they are like $1.99 and a full meal for 2 adults. This already has the tomato sauce frozen in the bag in small discs. And the calorie content is way low for how good it tastes. And I throw some frozen shrimp into the pan too, which I've defrosted under the tap.

8. You’re feeling really lazy. What kind of pizza do you order? Pepperoni. Deep dish from Giordano's. Thin crust from Leona's. (I know, I didn't know Leona's did great thin crust either until someone forced me to try it. It's awesome!!!) Doughy hand-tossed from Bacci Pizza Express by Wrigley Field. When I feel fancy I call in to Homemade Pizza Company and pick up a pepperoni and goat cheese pizza and bake it up in the oven when I get home.

9. You feel like cooking. What do you make? Something resembling jambalaya. It's really hard to fuck up rice, peppers, onion, turkey kielbasa, tomatoes, shrimp, chicken and cajun spices.

10. Do any foods bring back good memories? My Mom's brisket: So many Jewish holidays worth; I can taste it right now. It just falls apart in your mouth. We Jews call that "gedempt".

11. Do any foods bring back bad memories? Anything with Jack Daniels. It was in college.

12. Do any foods remind you of someone? No, just me, eating it.

13. Is there a food you refuse to eat? Bananas. But not because I don't like them; because I'm allergic. They make my mouth itchy. This makes me sad because I quite liked bananas before they made me itch. Foods I don't eat because I dislike them: celery, cucumber, most melons.

14. What was your favorite food as a child? Was then, is now, and always will be: Cheese and French Silk Pie from Baker's Square. Not together though.

15. Is there a food that you hated as a child but now like? Tomatoes

16. Is there a food that you liked as a child but now hate? No. This also doesn't help my eating problem.

17. Favorite fruit and vegetable: Fruit - mango. Vegetable - do potatoes count? If not, carrots.

18. Favorite junk food: Cheetos (baked are actually better than the original) and Edy's Slow Churned Double Fudge Brownie

19. Favorite between meal snack: Cheese & crackers

20. Do you have any weird food habits? I'm not even touching this one...Do you think I'd have a BLOG about my weight problem if I didn't have weird food habits????

21. You’re on a diet. What food(s) do you fill up on? Yoplait Thick N' Creamy Light yogurt, fruits, almonds (in small amounts), side salads, Fiber One bars

22. You’re off your diet. Now what would you like? Where to begin??? Cheese, Chinese food, Mexican food, Indian food.

23. How spicy do you order Indian/Thai? Mild-medium

24. Can I get you a drink? Water or Lime LaCroix. A Diet Coke or coffee if I'm tired.

25. Red or White Wine? White. Chardonnay usually. If eating steak I'll go with a Cabernet.

26. Favorite dessert? French Silk Pie. It's perfect. Pie crust and chocolate mousse and whipped cream and pieces of chocolate on top. 'Nuff said.

27. The perfect nightcap? One large chocolate covered Bing cherry from Trader Joe's

I'm tagging anyone who is reading this who wants to be tagged! Let me know if you post it.

Back on the wagon

Hi everybody. It's been a while since I've posted anything about my weight loss journey. Not just because of the wedding, but honestly I've been going backwards for a while now. The scale this morning said 182. Ugh. It could be worse, I guess. Based on how much I ate over the past 5 months, it SHOULD have been much worse. So that means I have only lost 20 lbs. now, going backwards 9.5 lbs. from my lowest weight of 172.5.

I will not be so hard on myself because it was a very emotionally draining time in my life. And now it's over. And now I'm moving forward; the only direction I can go. As of yesterday, I recommitted to my healthy eating habits. And today I go back to the gym for the first time in what seems like forever: Free of fear of injuring myself, free from all the stresses that I let stop me from going in the first place. My body feels like it wants to be there. My body is sore from the inactivity of the last 4 days. We were very active for most of the honeymoon--- swimming, hiking, walking---and I can feel my body wanting MORE.

I'm not sure where this puts me in Jessie's Biggest Loser Challenge. I don't even remember what weight I started at when I signed up! I think I'll tell her to put me back at zero and I'll start new this week.

I'm also going through the confusion of trying to get my name changed. Since I know I have a few bride-to-be readers out there, I wanted to share this website I found that was very helpful. It's the only website I've found on the issue of "name change due to marriage" that doesn't cost anything and points you towards the right documents on other websites. Not sure how helpful this will be to those living outside the US, but check it out anyway. It's maintained by a lawyer who said he started the site because he felt bad for new brides trying to find out the correct info on name changing, as it's a very convoluted process that can differ from state to state. www.bridelaw.com

We're back!

Hey everybody! We're back from the honeymoon and boy did we have a lot of crazy adventures! Including a tour in a rickety broke-ass bus up the side of the Sierra Madres, TWO insect stings (one bee and one Crazy Jungle Wasp), and swimming in several waterfalls. It was a GREAT trip and our house is a MESS after all the wedding and honeymoon crap that now is scattered everywhere. I've got a lot to do before I can post about it, but I wanted to share with you guys some photos from the photographer (my favorite is this one at the left.) He maintains a blog and puts up a sampling of photos as a "sneak peek" before the whole online album is available. Enjoy!

Click here for the "day after" shoot

Click here for wedding photos

Top Wedding Moments

1. Walking down the aisle. Imagine being suddenly overwhelmed by all 5 senses at once. Sound - hearing a string trio play The Beatles "Here, There and Everywhere". Sight - every face that I love and respect coming at me in a wave of joy. Smell - the scent of the flowers mixed in with the warm fall breeze. Touch - feeling my dress brush my bare ankles and my hands clenched tightly around my bouquet. Taste -- ok, well I guess not ALL 5 senses. And as I walk through this sea of love I am met by my parents half-way, who guide me on either side through the sea to my new husband.
2. My dearest cousin Pamela singing "At Last" in the middle of the ceremony, accompanied by the string trio. We could hardly look at each other for bursting into tears of joy! It is not easy being the singer for a wedding of a person that you love dearly. Goodbye breath support!
3. Seclusion: this is a Jewish custom --- the bride and groom immediately rush off to a private room after the ceremony to share their first moments together alone as man and wife. And of course, the Jews also wrote in there that we should share our first MEAL together as man and wife while in this seclusion. Which you can imagine I was very excited about. I believe the first thing I said to Mike as I walked out of the ceremony area was not, "I love you", but "Let's eat!" I had the caterer pre-set a plate of assorted appetizers and 2 glasses of champagne, which we enjoyed thoroughly! The seclusion gave us time to really soak in the moment and take a nice breather together. It also re-energized us to tackle the cocktail hour/reception, as we were VERY tired by that point.
   
4. Doing photos BEFORE the ceremony. This was brilliant and I thank my photographer Jeremy Lawson for this idea. He staged a "reveal" for Mike to see me with my dress on for the first time, about 3 hours prior to the ceremony. It was a very special moment. Then we took advantage of the few hours before the ceremony to get all of the family and bridal party photos out of the way. This way we didn't have to spend the cocktail hour taking pictures --- we were actually able to join the cocktail hour right after our 10 minute seclusion and talk to ALL of our guests! And seeing Mike before the ceremony was actually very wonderful. We were able to spend more of the day together that way --- which I believe is very important; especially because we didn't spend a lot of time together during the reception because we were too busy talking with our guests and dancing with our friends!
5. Tasting the cake. Not only was it fun to feed Mike with my hands, but the cake was AMAZING!!! Seriously, best wedding cake I've EVER had. MANY people said this as well. It wasn't the most impressive looking cake, but damn was it heavenly to the taste. White cake with white buttercream frosting, with alternating layers of raspberry bavarian creme and custard bavarian creme. It was so moist and sweet. It actually tasted better in bulk than the smaller sample they made for me back in March. It was from Central Continental Bakery in Mt. Prospect, IL. Thank God I didn't do fondant. Yeech.
6. Our first dance: to "Is This Love" by Bob Marley. A perfect song that represents us to a tee! Mike and I were in our own little world up there on the dance floor.
   
7. Dancing with Dad: to "My Girl". Cheesey, yes, but we danced to this song at my Bat Mitzvah 15 years ago and I couldn't not use it again. It was so perfect.
   
8. Dancing The Hora: Oh My God. BEST HORA EVER!!!! You'll see when I get the photos back from the photographer just how crazy we got (he actually got in the middle of the circle and took photos of people as they rushed by, and went in and out-- God, my photog ruled!) Mike and I were hoisted up in the air on chairs; however Mike's chair was leaning more forward, so he was afraid to let go with his hands to hold the napkin between us! So I leaned over and shoved the napkin in his mouth, then shoved the other end in my mouth, and we bounced up and down in the air with a napkin between our teeth!!!
   
9. The flowers: OMG the flowers were amazing. At least 10 people asked us who did our flowers and where can we get his contact info. Well, his name is Keith Davis and if you want his info, message me. My bouquet was so amazing, I didn't put it down all night! I wanted to enjoy every minute of it!!!
10. The photographer: Jeremy was an amazing chameleon, weaving in and out with hardly a notice. He took 3,200 pictures!!!! After he sorts through them all, we'll see about 1,080 online he says. He is so creative, fun and sweet. Our "day after" photo shoot yesterday was brilliant and I can't wait to see those shots of us at Ravine Drive beach. My dress is trashed from the knee down, but whatever. I'm never wearing it again, so it was worth it.
11. Brannen, my "Day Of" Coordinator: I HIGHLY recommend to all brides (especially those who have worked so hard to plan everything themselves) that you get someone to be the Day Of Coordinator that you feel you can trust. Brannen took care of EVERYTHING from rehearsal through the end of the reception and I was able to just float along and enjoy every moment of it without a care or worry in the world. Whenever problems popped up through the weekend, everyone went to Brannen and not me to solve them. I was in blissful ignorance. Best money we ever spent.
12. My bridesmaids: They were so on the ball and fulfilled my every need without me even knowing I needed it! You often hear stories about bridesmaids being unhelpful and just taking up space, but not my girls!!! They were all over it and made my day so special.
    

See you in a week!!!

Mr. and Mrs. Nichols

It was amazing. Unbelievable. Overwhelming. Brilliant. Everything I'd imagined and more. The weather was PERFECT. 83 degrees and sunny. The following day it rained and rained --- someone was looking out for us. :-) My coordinator and vendors were magnificent. My family and friends sublime. And Michael. What an amazing man.

It was Sunday and I'm still exhausted now on Tuesday. I got 12 hours of sleep last night, to make up for all the 5 - 6 hour of sleep nights over the past week. My fabulous friend Kristy emailed me all the photos she took with her camera and she did an amazing job. The photographer's photos should be up online in 2 - 3 weeks. We have another photo shoot tomorrow, just me, Mike and the photographer, at the beach in Highland Park. We get to wear our wedding clothes again!

There is so much to say and I have so little energy. Well, enough energy to drive over to the bank to make a deposit, of course. :-) We leave for Puerto Vallarta on Friday for 7 days. We are enjoying having these 4 days to get our act together and rest a little before the honeymoon. Enjoy the photos and I'll try to pop on again before we leave to share with you some of my favorite memories --- all of which have been spinning around in my head the past 2 days.

A perfect day. It was a perfect day. I am still dreamy with the memories of it all...

Home Stretch

I am finally in the home stretch. Yesterday was my last day of work until October 15th. Aw hell yeah! For the next 2 days I am running the following errands with Mom:

1. Go to Bed, Bath & Beyond to buy paper hand towels (apparently the bathrooms at the venue only have airdryers and they suggested we provide hand towels for our guests, so off we go!)
2. Go to dress shop where I'm getting the rehearsal dinner dress fitted to FINALLY take it home with me. This is the 3rd time now that I'm going to pick it up. The other 2 times it needed more adjustments. It better be ready this time!
3. Go to venue to review final details with the caterer/venue coordinator and drop off all wedding related tchotchkes (cake knife, cake topper, guest book, etc.)
4. Go to other dress shop to pick up wedding gown and veil
5. Go to hotel to drop off out-of-towner welcome bags
6. Get manicure/pedicure
7. Pass out

I think #7 will just come naturally. :-)

So it's really here ya'll. I've gained about 5 lbs. in the past 3 months and I'm ok with it. I look good, I feel good, and I'm gonna have a blast. And my photographer is brilliant so I'm sure he'll do his best to get all my good angles. :-) I'm sure I'll post some candid photos of the wedding next week, as we'll have 4 days before we leave for Mexico. I'm so excited. This is going to be awesome.

Love yas!

So much better

I am feeling so much better! I took Friday off and thank God I did because I was a sneezy, snotty mess all day! I was able to rest most of the weekend too, and I feel SOOO much better. I have now moved from the "Irritated/Bitchy/Mood-swing Julie" of last week to the "Excited/Bubbly/Can't Wait Julie". Yay!!! Not a whole lot left to do, but all important things --- like confirming details with vendors and dropping off stuff at the venue and hotel. Yesterday I organized all of the wedding junk into separate shopping bags so I can have everything together --- one bag for the ceremony stuff, two bags for the reception stuff, another bag for things I'll need only at the hotel, etc. So much crap, it's really hard to keep track of everything! I just need to get through these last 3 days at work and I'm home free. Thursday can't get here soon enough!!!

Biggest Loser Challenge

I recently joined a new weight loss challenge on Jessie's blog. She's a big fan of the tv show, "The Biggest Loser" and saw this as an opportunity to put herself and her readers to the challenge. Check out Jessie's blog and leave her a comment if you want to join the challenge!

I started coming down with cold symptoms yesterday. I immediately started downing Airborne cocktails. I don't like taking Airborne tablets in just plain water (gross!) so I put one in a glass of OJ to make it go down easier. It really helps! My throat is feeling less sore today, but my nose is starting to get runny/stuffy. I'm sure it's just minor cold symptoms, but wouldn't you know, 10 days before the wedding they have to show up. And to think I made it through the entire summer without so much as a sniffle, and now this! Well, all I can do is take it easy and keep pumping myself full of vitamins and Throat Coat tea (every singer's best friend.)

Bachelorette Party!

My bachelorette party was this weekend. IT WAS AWESOME!!!! Me and 7 of my closest girlfriends met up at the Ambassador East Hotel where my bridesmaids rented a suite! We started with drinks at the world-famous Pump Room (Frank Sinatra had his own booth there), followed by appetizers, drinks and gifts in the suite upstairs, followed by a light dinner at Big Bowl (chinese), followed by me getting too drunk too fast and almost throwing up (but I didn't!) followed by me pulling a Balki Bartokomoos in the lobby's revolving door, followed by more girl talk and lots of water-drinking in the suite, followed by sleepy. The next morning my bridesmaids and I did breakfast at Corner Bakery and took some morning-after photos at the hotel for nostalgia sake. I got some GREAT gifts (Benefit cosmetics, a silky Vera Wang robe, lingerie from Trousseau, and some other fun things that shall not be named...) and my friends are the most amazing people in the world!!! They made me feel like a queen and it was a fantastic night!

It's really starting to sink in now that we're close. Real close. 2 weeks away. I'm trying to not get overwhelmed by thinking too far into the future. I need to focus on TODAY and not worry about things like the weather forecast, if something will go wrong, etc. Things I have done all I can do to help and are now out of my hands. I need to keep reminding myself to live in the moment and get through the next 2 weeks without freaking myself out too much, so I can enjoy the weekend when it arrives! No matter what happens it's going to be the best day and only I have the ability to control how I react to everything. I choose to let it all go AND ENJOY THE RIDE!!!

Here are some fun pics (well, the ones I felt comfortable publishing in the blogosphere!):

3 Weeks Away

3 Weeks Away --- I can't wait. Let's do this thing!

I met with Mom this weekend and caught her up to speed with all of the wedding details. We made a big list on a giant Post-It on the wall to record our "To Dos". It felt really good to be able to list everything out like that and then delegate who would be responsible for what. For example, Mom is in charge of telling the caterer the final headcount, whereas I'm in charge of making a song list for the DJ with Mike. Some items we'll do together (putting together the out-of-town gift bags) and some other items (pick up bagels/lox for breakfast on day of) we were able to delegate to Dad, brother, etc.

The biggest thing I need to do is finish my list for Brannen, my day of coordinator. I'm listing out all the details for each vendor so he can make confirmation calls the week before the wedding. I'm very lucky to have a great friend like him who is flying in from South Carolina to do this. He just moved there a month ago, but he promised to do my wedding way before he knew he was moving, and I'm so glad he stayed committed to running the show on the Big Day. I trust him 100% and I know I'll be able to relax with everything in his hands. Now I've just got to GET everything in his hands. :-)

I just joined the weight loss challenge on Jessie's blog -- check it out! It's to coincide with the start of the new season of the show "The Biggest Loser". I figure the show will be running for a while so I joined now, knowing that I have no intention on really focusing on it until after my honeymoon. I mean, I'll still weigh in, but I'm planning on enjoying the food at my wedding/honeymoon. But once I'm back, it's full steam ahead! Check out Jessie's challenge here.

High Tea

High Tea at the Ritz-Carlton was so lovely. It was nice to pretend for an afternoon that we were fancy rich high-society people.

We each ordered one kind of tea (I got apricot black tea, Mom got vanilla black tea) and they brought us an assortment of treats. The room was magnificent and the couches we relaxed on for an hour and a half were divine. We did a lot of good mother-daughter pre-wedding chatting.

This is the fountain in the middle of the lounge where the tea was. The statue in the middle is of a beautiful crane. Later on, a piano player started playing beautiful jazz and broadway songs. I almost lost it when he started playing "The Rainbow Connection"!

Here's Mom, enjoying the cushy couch.

This is the vaulted ceiling above the crane fountain. This detail ran around the top portion of the entire room as well.